Tuesday, February 23rd, 2021

Ask MetaFilter. How do you get myself to simply enjoy that the hook-up that is good?

Ask MetaFilter. How do you get myself to simply enjoy that the hook-up that is good?

It is not as if i have been refused, it really is more that the thing that is whole a lark, and seems pretty self-contained (a lot of those who have no idea each other stay together in a property for a week-end; crazy things happen; then everybody dates back with their life). The good news is, the euphoria for the moment it self has worn down, and I also find myself experiencing, on a smaller sized scale, the exact same thoughts we feel once I’ve been dumped.

How do you get myself to simply enjoy that the good hook-up occurred?

That you do not? We actually don’t think that ladies are designed to, biologically, feel okay about any of it. Bold statement, i understand, but hear me down. I am maybe maybe maybe not saying ladies CANNOT feel okay with situations such as this, but merely that it is synthetic and/or forced. It is an artifact of willpower.

I’m certain individuals will let me know I am sexist or some such, and that is fine.

And that means you either force it away with will-power (grr, hear me roar), or study from the experience and alter techniques as time goes on. published by phrakture at 1:59 PM may 27, 2009 [3 favorites]

I truly wouldn’t like to appear dismissive, but i suggest perhaps not dwelling upon it by, as an example, asking AskMe questions regarding it, and venturing out and creating a few more good memories alternatively, whether with friends, by yourself, on dates, whatever.

These suggestions is improper for crippling sadness or other really mental poison, needless to say. But really, once the emotions tend to be more moderate, distraction often could be the solution, and in-depth introspection on getting rid associated with feeling is certainly not.

Action from the computer. published by game warden to your activities rhino at 2:01 PM may 27, 2009 [1 favorite]

Everybody else (not merely women) will get emotionally confused after having a antichat intimate encounter. It is fine to believe that means, and it’ll pass.

I might most likely offer myself authorization to feel only a little sad for the while that is little after which We’d state “time’s up!”, move ahead with my entire life, and feel well in regards to the experience all together. Whenever one thing has a newbie and a center, it may be unfortunate to get to the finish. posted by juliplease at 2:08 PM may 27, 2009 [1 favorite]

Agreeing with distraction. Do not dwell about it, but if only a little minute of delight about any of it arises then by all means savor it.

Funny sufficient, your concern simply made me nostalgic once and for all hook up moments (within the aftermath of that we felt much like the way you feel now, so that it does pass!). posted by KAS at 2:38 PM may 27, 2009

We frequently intellectually examine intimate and psychological emotions. Sometimes that is good – but in other cases the brain is incorrect therefore the human anatomy or heart is appropriate.

You offered into a brief minute of intimate power which was welcoming and fun and that is it. The mind now would like to be in in the action following the reality and place it really is two cents in plus it doesn’t always have an idea. Would you hear a voice that is little states you need to expect more and that is why should you feel dumped? Let you know’re mind to butt away. You’d a good time. The body respected the chance and enjoyed as soon as. You have got absolutely nothing to feel dumped about.

Now should your head is a bit that is little and also you are anticipating more from a moment that probably won’t give you any – you need to comprehend that. That does not suggest there is any such thing incorrect to you. Our company is significantly trained by different social constructs to expect more from a lot of things in life. But often life simply provides little moments that require to be valued for just what they certainly were – an event that has been enjoyable for a while that is little that’s it. published by dog meals sugar at 2:52 PM may 27, 2009 [2 favorites]

Oxytocin. A bonding hormone that is released during touch/sex. It may provide you with that sense of abandonment. The a valuable thing is the fact that it’s going to work it really is way to avoid it of the human body I. Several days up to a couple of weeks. Therefore simply take the “dumped” feeling and feel it due to the fact chemical in your body.

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